Arsenal, Uganda Cranes and UCU Canons Teetotallers 101

Flair, text book stuff, basics and a unique culture are crucial to any major achievement. The trick though is how well balanced a team is and how much consistence it exudes on the big stage. That achieved, what separates the big boys from the crowd of wannabes is the ‘X’ factor and how much of it one has has stocked up.

If we are to demystify the UCU Canons progress over the last five or so years, it is one team I think has a lot of potential to dominate the league. Given the unmatched basketball court at the Mukono Campus, a pool of students to choose from; and the opportunity to provide scholarships to outstanding players. Credit where it is due, I think there has been a fair outsourcing of impeccable international players who do a decent job in institutional tournaments and regular league games (most of the time). There is a rare passion and flair to look forward to whenever the canons are playing.

Problem though is, in big games, there is always an emotional haze to muddle through, a sort of juvenile inferiority complex and inconsistence. The winning attitude gets trodden on by more experienced opponents yet on average the university side always seems to have more ammunition up their sleeves- youthful agility and all.

 
The bigger problem for me though has always been on the reliance on a thin squad. When a particular on-form player gets fouled out, it is hard to find an equally efficient replacement off the bench.  There appears to be a misplacement of strategy to the extent that apart from scholarships there is not much incentive earmarked to keep a hold of the best players once they are done with school. It was not a great sight, watching Affidra sink our team and the mighty Suudi Ulanga failing to make double figures. I am a great fun of this Mukono side but I do not always look forward to the play offs….I always hope we win them but I am never surprised when we do not, I hope Nick and Rev Ssenyonyi see my point (bleachers’ version.) At the end of the day it goes back to what one sets out to achieve, but I would like to suggest that real glory is not such a bad idea.

 

Mr. Wenger is such a formidable manager but sometimes one’s ideology can be one’s undoing especially when one is oblivious to a change in tide. It is good to have French players on your team but bear in mind that it is no longer France ’98 and none of those players it Zidane, Trezeguet, Ribery or Henry anymore.  It could be that you think some players are overpriced but that only plays out if you can actually develop a team of only Van Persies and actually manage to hold on to them. Otherwise, forget about ever seeing a Ronaldo, Messi or Neymar putting on an arsenal Jersey unless of course they have exchanged shirts after a champions league game.

My dear Uganda Cranes, it has been over thirty years but we are still hoping arithmetics will throw us an ace. We send the Nile to the Pharaohs for crying out loud. Ok, we have one stadium and a half (in case Nakivubo counts), we win CECAFA, we beat Kenya most of the time and we seldom lose at Namboole. 

Maybe government does not invest adequately in sports, maybe FUFA is run by one family, maybe we can fire and hire coaches at will; maybe we have a coaching team of seven wannabes per game…..I do not give two hoots, just qualify for one major tournament and we can talk. Learn from Kiprotich and his Kip buddies.

I will not talk about the extremely overrated English team because at least Brazil is still making me proud…ish. The big stage requires something fresh on the menu, some sort of resilience…it is hard ball, it is not a junior league. Funs endure a lot of silent torture and it is understandable but do they have to? Just wondering why some teams are always content with being the undercard when they can be so much more.

Over to them.

Coccodiosis

How best can I begin this surmise than by relating a social media exchange I had or rather someone attempted to have with me. This is how it happened. I posted on how profound I thought Bebe Cool’s chorus in the above titled song was. (I am working on the presumption that you realize that I have borrowed his song title for this piece, wrong spelling and all). So a friend comments on how the song breeds hatred and how God should have mercy on me!!! I love to think that each of us has a slightly clearer picture about how streamlined our moral turpitude is, than observers….good intentions notwithstanding. (TWIMC) I’ll leave it at that.

Naye, before I steer clear of this rift, this is how that tide flows. I have strong religious inclinations of my own, yet I find a lot to learn from the birds that sing, the bruised toe, the ache at the back of my neck; an eyebrow that uproots itself and decides to linger in the path of my vision…trivias and some more trivias of life. Again like my nose, you have your opinion, and I am so not smoking your pipe.

Anyhow, I have come to the dawning of what an extreme incline it is to surmount the ordeal of sustaining a conversation with someone of a different intellectual inspiration than ourselves; unless, of course you are an extreme adventurist, psyche or incredibly patient chit-chatter. There is a huge propensity for boredom, a mental haze , Riviera or something like that. Even if you decided to talk about shoes, hair, nails, soccer, cars and the like; you would not help but appreciate that the divergence of opinion on literary anything is not as narrow as the Northern bypass. (If I have been elevated to a certain political system and now think I can stand better on my own, it is not unlikely that I will stand in Masaka and in a husky voice, aided by not the tiniest eyes in the world; shout, “Aja’genda..”

As a student, one’s mind is pregnant with academic prospects, demands, challenges and even pun. Yet when you dare damp such excitement on a pensioner, you are right beyond your sensitivity cavity my friend. It is not only a torture but an unnecessary one to say the least. This cuts across disciplines. No offence, but tell me whether you would have a field day engaging Justine Bieber in medical jargon? Just talk music, clothes, hair styles and you would be good to go. You might like your hands splashing in the ocean and I relish my feet in the sand but it doesn’t mean neither of us is having fun. Maybe what is good for the goose is good for the kiga (gander) but one man’s rolex can be another man’s food poisoning.

It pays to know your pay grade but if you are tempted to get an overdraft, be sure to know how to spend it.  If Arsenal has never bought a player worth more than (I can’t even find a Euro sound on my PC), anyway ….never more than 23 million something; why should you be surprised that Wenger is keeping 116 million without knowing whom to spend it on a few  weeks into the transfer window. It is called culture shock. Again he is the coach, you are not…he has the money, you don’t so keep your nose to your genius self. It helps to know when to say what, to whom and for what. Otherwise you linger and grope in the dark walls of irrelevance and obnoxiousness.

Anyway, Mr. Munene, please come for your IP rights for your contribution to this piece if I get a penny. Speaking of originality and relevance, I could have titled this something like, “ Ebyo biyamba gwe tomalila budde”, but I didn’t want to presume that ffena turi basajja ba Kabaka (that we would understand the translation).